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Last-Minute Writing Opportunity from Focus on the Family!

I hope you don't mind me sending an extra entry in order to share this last-minute need from Focus on the Family. Editor Andrea Guitierrez is looking for a personal story on how you taught your child to respect and appreciate an elder relative, and she needs it by this Friday, July 30!

You can read her request here. Guidelines are very specific, so be sure to follow closely. And please don't submit something that doesn't fit. It won't help you or Andrea. πŸ™‚

Be blessed, my friends!

Vonda

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Interview and Book Give-Away with Author/Speaker Laura Petherbridge

This is the fourth Tuesday, which means it's time for an author interview and book giveaway! Today it's a joy to introduce my friend, author and speaker, Laura Petherbridge. Laura is an international speaker who serves couples and single adults with topics on spiritual growth, relationships, stepfamilies, co-parenting, and divorce recovery. She's also the author of two books. Her first book, When "I Do" Becomes "I Don't"-Practical Steps for Healing During Separation and Divorce, was endorsed by Billy Graham's daughter, Gigi, and Multi-Dove Award winner Kim Hill. Her newest release, The Smart Stepmom, is co-authored with stepfamily expert Ron Deal and endorsed by Gary Chapman (Five Love Languages).

Laura has spoken at the Billy Graham Training Center, The Cove, in Asheville, NC and has been featured in Australia, South Africa, and England. She has appeared on many TV and radio programs, including Focus on the Family, Family Life Today, and Moody Broadcasting, and is frequently published in top Christian magazines and websites.

Laura is a featured expert on the DivorceCare DVD series, has taught on divorce recovery at Reformed Theological Seminary in Orlando, and has functioned as a Stephen's Ministry instructor.

Laura and her husband, Steve, reside in Lady Lake, FL. She can be reached at and

Want to win one of Laura's books? Don't forget to leave a comment on this interview and you'll be in the drawing. Be sure to check back next week to see if you're the winner!

Welcome to The Christian Writer's Den, Laura. First of all, you've been a divorce recovery expert for 20 years. Tell us how you got started.

My parents divorced when I was 8, and my one goal in life was to never be divorced. Therefore, when my first husband walked out of our marriage and into the arms of another woman I was devastated. As a new Christian, I could not find help or hope in the midst of the trauma. I thought my life was over, and I even considered suicide. As time went on more and more women started coming to me for insight on how I survived. I prayed God would somehow use this pain for His Glory. And He did.

So, how did you end up writing a book on the subject?

After several years of leading divorce recovery support groups I recognized a pattern in the questions people asked. My desire was to compile those questions and provide answers.

I was speaking at a single's conference and a woman came up to me afterwards and said, "You are an excellent speaker, do you have anything in writing?" That woman was the editor for a newsletter sponsored by a publisher. I had just received a rejection from a large magazine for an article I wrote on grieving the death of a marriage. She loved it, printed it, and the publishing house called me and asked if I'd be interested in writing a book on the subject.  That's how, When ‘I Do' Becomes ‘I Don't-Practical Steps for Healing During Separation and Divorce came into existence.

Wow! That doesn't happen very often! I'd say God wanted you to write that book! You mention the "death" of a marriage. Why do you describe it that way?

Most people don't realize that divorce is a death. It's the death of the dream, the covenant, and "what should have been." In many ways it's worse than physical death because it's a chosen rejection, and no one shows up at your door with a tuna casserole. In addition, there are more layers of loss with divorce. Many people lose their homes, in-laws, church, finances, health insurance, retirement security, pets, and even friends to name just a few. But the largest loss is the children. Even if they have custody, they no longer have control over who or what influences come into the child's life when the child is with the other parent. And if a remarriage occurs that adds an entire new set of circumstances.

Remarriage statistics show that 2 out of 3 stepfamilies don't survive. Why is that?

Stepfamilies are extremely complicated and there are various reasons why they end in divorce. The most common reason is because all stepfamilies are birthed out of loss. Either a death or divorce has occurred for the stepfamily to form. This means everyone is grieving to some degree, including the children.

A second reason is that many people move into a second marriage without dealing with the death or divorce from the first marriage. They believe they are ready to move on before they actually heal. It would be similar to having a heart attack. The person may feel better but if he or she tries to run a marathon in that condition, rather than allowing it to fully heal, they can damage the heart more. 

This is what happens when a person doesn't dig down into the root reasons the divorce occurred, beyond the affair, addiction, abuse and discovers, "How did I get here? Why did I marry that person?"

Christians often think if the spouse died, rather than divorce, that the kids will embrace the new spouse. This is erroneous thinking. That's why I wrote The Smart Stepmom with stepfamily expert Ron Deal. We cover the massive and complex issues associated with being in a stepfamily. We wrote it for women because they typically are the one buying a book, but it's really for anyone in or around a stepfamily.

Why do the children struggle with a new stepparent?

Kids, even adult kids, do not view the new marriage as a good thing, but rather a threat. They have lost one parent in some manner, and now they fear this new marriage will take away the remaining parent.

And to a large degree they are correct. The child must move to the back seat so the new sp
ouse can sit in the front seat. He/she must become first if the marriage is to survive. The problem is most single parents think they can get married and keep the kids in the front seat, and put the new spouse there also. It doesn't work in a car, or in a stepfamily. This doesn't mean the children should be abandoned or neglected but the new marriage becomes the high priority and everyone feels the tension.   

That's so true. I've seen that happen in two second marriages…and I'm sad to say they didn't make it. You've given us all a lot to think about, Laura. Thank you for taking the time to share your heart and your expertise with us.

I'm sure that there is someone reading this today who needs help in this area. In addition to her great books, Laura's website has lots of free information, including videos, articles, and quizzes that will help you in your situation. I hope you'll check it out. 

And don't forget to leave a comment for Laura or me and you'll be in the drawing for a free book. I'll announce the winner in next week's blog.

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It's Not too Late to Pray…womenwhorequest

This weekend–July 30-31–I'll be speaking at the Women's Prayer Retreat at Anderson University in Anderson, SC. This will be a special time for women from all over the upstate of SC to come together and lift our needs to the Father. Please join me. We need women to pray. After all, praying women can make a difference! Check out the Anderson University website for more information.

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And this week, as I prepare for my Prayer Retreat session on repentance, I want to share this verse with you. May it speak to your heart as it did to my own:

This is the one I esteem: he who is humble and contrite in spirit, and trembles at my word. Isaiah 66:2b

I pray God's blessing on the work of your hands and your hearts,

Vonda

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Filters, Elvis, and a Sequined Jumpsuit: The Subtleties of Good Writing

I had the joy and honor of hosting Cec Murphey at my home for several events this past weekend, and what a weekend it was! I watched as he ministered to Christians at my church, to people struggling with drug addiction, alcoholism, and homelessness at a Celebrate Recovery meeting, and to writers who feel they may eventually be driven to alcoholism and drug addiction by the frustrations associated with writing!

Seriously, it was a weekend of encouragement and challenge. Encouragement to stay the course when things aren't going as planned, and challenge to create the best work we can with the gifts we've been given.

I learned a variety of things from Cec, but today I want to focus on a term he used in the writer's workshop: Filtering. It was a new term to me. For example: I heard a soft knock. Cec explained that by saying I heard…, we move out of the character's POV and become an observer.

It took me a moment to grasp what he was saying, but then I understood when I thought of it this way: If it had been written, There was a soft knock at the door… or something along those lines, it's simply stated as fact. But when we add the character's I heard…, we're filtering the action through the character. That puts distance between the reader and the action, almost like adding a middle man, hence the word, filter.

Now, don't get me wrong. You DO want to stay in the POV character's head. (And if you don't have a clue what I'm talking about, check out this lesson on POV and head-hopping.) But filtering is different from POV.

In POV (point of view), you want to see the scene, feel the emotion, detect the odors, hear the noises, and struggle with the conflict through the POV character's emotions and senses. Let's imagine that John really wants to impress Gail on their first date, so he wears his best Elvis jumpsuit, the one with the red and gold sequins.

Reality is, John thinks he's hot, but Gail thinks he's an idiot. As the writer, you can't tell us what Gail thinks, even though it's true. If you're in John's POV for that scene, you can describe Gail's actions, but not her feelings or thoughts. And–right or wrong–her actions would be described through John's POV.

You could write something like:

Why didn't she take the booth right here by the buffet line? Oh, wait. I get it. The back table. Where it's dark. Really dark. Yep, she can't resist me. It's the sequins.

Okay, I know that's a simplified, ridiculous version, but you get the idea. John is interpreting her actions incorrectly–through his own hopes and dreams, through his own POV.

When you add filtering, the reader isn't simply seeing it through the character's POV, but the character actually inserts him or herself between the reader and the action:

I watched as she passed the booth next to the buffet line and walked toward the back table…

In both instances he sees her walk past the booth and head to the cover of darkness (and I don't blame her!). But in the first example, we feel his confusion and get a glimpse of his emotion associated with it. In the second, the character himself has been inserted into the sentence, separating us from the immediacy of his thought processes.

Cec said filtering is a very subtle concept, and I must agree. But it's often those subtle concepts, those minute details, that can make a huge difference in our skill as writers.

And they can make a huge difference in the acceptance and rejection of our work.

(Elvis photo courtesy of Bing.com)

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Writing Opportunities Selected Just for YOU!clockfreeimages

I just heard today from ANOTHER Christian Writer's Den reader who has a probable acceptance from an opportunity listed here. Don't miss your chance!

1.     Guideposts' Extraordinary Answers to Prayer series continues. Book 10, The Power of Praying Together, is accepting submissions until August 15. Check here for The Power of Praying Together writer's guidelines.  

2.     Many of our readers have been published in LIVE. Here are the latest needs from LIVE editor Richard Bennett.

3.     Internet Café Devotions for Women accepts submissions. Be sure to check the guidelines carefully. 

4.     Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine is looking for sci-fi stories and poetry. 

5.     Mentoring Moments for Christian Women is looking for articles for November and December. (Thanks, Carolyn!)

6.     ADDitude Magazine guidelines here. 

7.     Cindy Jones is looking for book reviewers and writers to interview authors for her upcoming blog, Bookends Blog. If you'd like to talk with Cindy about her needs, please contact her at .

8.     Capper's Magazine accepts submissions on living in the Midwest. 

9.     Blue Ridge Country Magazine needs articles and photos. (Just added: I'm sorry–this link is not working today, but I'll leave it in case it's a temporary situation.)

10. The Kids' Ark, a Christian children's magazine. 

11. Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine guidelines here. 

12. Imagination Café  

The following opportunities  were collected by Linda Gilden and shared with us at the Cec Murphey writer's workshops this past weekend. Thanks, Linda!

13. Ohio Childhood Poems Anthology 

14. A Cup of Comfort for Christian Women 

15. Ruminate Magazine 

16. Pockets Magazine for Kids 

Well, that should keep you busy for a while. Be sure to let me know if you hear good news! πŸ™‚

(Clock photo courtesy of FreeImages.co.uk) 

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Writer's Conferences and Worshops:

1.     July 26-30: Camp MyOwnBook (for kids), AnAuthor World, Greenville, SC 

2.     August 7: Page 2 Conference, AnAuthor World, Greenville, SC 

3.     August 28: Upstate SC American Christian Writers, Anderson, SC 

4.     September 11: Celebration of Books, Authors and Readers invited, Highlands, NC. Contact

5.     September 17-18: North Texas Christian Writers Conference, Keller, TX. I'll be there and would love to see you! 

6.     October 3-7: Blue Ridge Christian Novelist Retreat, Ridgecrest, NC

7.     October 19-22: Southwest Christian Writers Studio, Glorieta, NM. Edie Melson will be teaching there and would love to see you! 

8.     November 10-14: CLASS Christian Writers Conference, Abiquiu, NM. I'll be there and would love to see you! 

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Any Chance We Could Connect?

I'll be speaking around the country in the next few months and would love to see if we could connect. I hope you'll check out my calendar and see what's going on. Be sure to let me know if I'll be in your area. I'd love to meet you! 

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And now, as we continue this journey together, let's remember the words of Paul, written to the Galatians:

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

I pray God's blessing on the work of your hands and your hearts,

Vonda

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Submitting to Agents and Publishers

You've done everything you're supposed to do. You've taken the classes and been to critique and rewritten and edited and formatted. Your manuscript is ready. You're sure of it.

Time to throw your baby to the wolves.

Okay, I admit. That's a little overdramatic, but that's what it feels like, isn't it? Today we're going to look at a few submission-type things you can do to help the editor love your baby as much as you do.

1.  Do your research. As some of you have heard me confess, I didn't study the market with my first book. After all, I reasoned, every day I spent studying the market meant one more day that I was withholding this literary masterpiece from the reading public! So instead of studying who wanted what, I simply went down the list of children's book publishers and submitted to each one. I knew that even if they'd never published a children's mystery, they would certainly want to after reading my manuscript!

This is not a reasoning you want to follow. Besides the fact that it made me look like an idiot, it wasted gobs of money and hours and days and weeks and months AND YEARS of my life trying to force something that just was not going to happen!

Take the time to find the publishers who are specifically looking for your kind of book or article or script, and your chances will greatly increase.

2.  Send what they want. Carefully read and follow their guidelines. Some publishers only want a query. Some want a synopsis and the first three chapters. Others want the full manuscript. Send them exactly what they want. Nothing more, nothing less.

3.  For shorter pieces, be sure to follow the word count. Don't send a 2000 word article when the guidelines clearly state their word count is 600. You'll be instantly rejected.

4.  Send it the way they want it sent. Does the editor want the submission attached as a Word document? Sent as snail mail? Pasted into the body of the email? No need to argue or waste your time complaining or questioning. Just do what they say and you'll get off to a good start.

5.  Send it to the right person, Part A. Check carefully to see if there is more than one editor listed. If so, be sure to send it to the editor who handles your type of manuscript.

6.  Send it to the right person, Part B. Once you're sure you have the right editor, call the switchboard (NOT the editor!) and confirm that Jane Doe is still the correct editor for your genre submission. If not, get the correct name, correct spelling, and correct gender.

7.  Be professional, kind, and appreciative. Don't write "THIS IS YOUR NEXT BESTSELLER!" in the subject line. Don't act like you're doing them a favor by allowing them to read your work. Don't talk as if you're best friends simply because you had a 15 minute appointment with her at a conference. Thank him for his time and consideration. Be as professional with this submission as you'd be for any other job application.

8.  Format correctly. Since free formatting guidelines are available all over the internet, I won't list the all the steps to correct formatting for manuscripts, but here are the basics: Double space. Don't use any fancy fonts or formatting. Use 12 pt font. Number the pages. Use headers. And if they want hard copy submission, use white paper only.

9.  Don't bug the editor to death. At any given time, most editors have hundreds of submissions to consider. If we continually call or write, wanting to know the status of our submissions, we can develop a reputation as a high maintenance writer. And life is too short to take on that extra workload.

If you've waited the posted amount of time, follow up with a quick note requesting an update. But don't bug him or her to death. It makes it very easy for them to say no.

10.  Trust God and His providence. I still have to be reminded of this. Regardless of the cover, the title, the distribution, the changes, and the timing, God is in control. For whatever reason, He can allow the most unlikely book to become the bestseller or the most promising one to fall flat.

It's our job to write the best book or article or devotion we can possibly write, send it to the most likely publishers, work hard on marketing and promotion.

It's ultimately His job to decide what do to with it.

(Lambs photo courtesy of ChristianPhotos.net)

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Kudos to these Christian Writer's Den Readers…

Congratulations to the following writers who are doing the work, and seeing the result. Please join me as we celebrate together. I hope it encourages you!

1.     Phoebe Leggett (SC): Phoebe has been busy! First of all, her poem, Freedom, was featured on the cover of the July issue of LIVE magazine! (As an aside, almost every month I post the latest needs for LIVE magazine, and many of you have been published with them. But Freedom was submitted about two years ago, and it just came out! So, if you're someone who has to see quick results, you might want to look for another job!) Also, Phoebe has had TEN articles published with Pacific Press in Our Little Friend, and the eleventh has been accepted. Her article, Baptism, has been published in the Pentecostal Evangel and will be distributed in August, 2010. And, she had a letter to the editor published in the Greenville News on July 5. Way to go, Phoebe!

2.     Cheryl Barker (KS) : Cheryl's article, Meeting God in His Word, will be in the July 25 issue of Seek. Thanks for sharing your good news with us, Cheryl!

3.     Beth Fortune (SC): Beth also has several things to share. Her article, Daddy's Shoes, has been accepted by In Touch Magazine for a future issue. And Edie and I are so thrilled to have been part of this story's journey! Beth wrote this article last October at our Christian Writing Retreat in Todd, NC! Beth also had devotions published at ChristianDevotions.us on June 15 and July 11. Congratulations, Beth!

4.      Patty Mason (TN): Patty's new book, Transformed by Desire, was recently released! Be sure to check out the press release. Keep up the good work, Patty!

5.     Judi Clarke (AZ): Judy is a new member of our CWD family and has just started a blog, From Fear to Eternity, for Christians doing battle with fear. What a much-needed resource! Thank you, Judi! 

6.     Sheri Levy (SC): Sheri's article, Scent with Love, was just published in the July issue of Clubhouse Magazine! (Don't you just love that title?) Way to go, Sheri!

Congratulations to all these hardworking writers! Isn't it great to see God at work? Let's join together to celebrate our blessings with each other!

(Bubbles in sky photo courtesty of FreeImages.co.uk)

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It's Not Too Late to Participate in Free Writer's Workshops by Cec Murphey!

I can't believe the weekend is finally here! If you're near Upstate SC, please join us for any of these great events!

Saturday, July 17: We're honored that Cec Murphey, author of over 100 books, including the New York Times bestseller, 90 Minutes in Heaven, will present two free writer's workshops in Upstate SC!

10AM-12noon: Christian Supply, Spartanburg, SC (Writer's seminar 10-11, booksigning 11-12)

2PM-4PM: CrossWay Christian Supply, Greenville, SC  (Writer's seminar 2-3, booksigning 3-4)

Contact me to preregister with your name, address, and email and you'll be in a drawing for a free Cec Murphey book at the bookstore!

Cec will also be speaking at my home church, Westside Church, Simpsonville on Sunday, July 18 in both the 10:45AM and the 6:00PM services. Visit the church website for more info.

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And now, as we face another week of writing and rewriting, formatting and submission, let's remember that fear is not of God:

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

I pray God's blessing on the work of your hands and your hearts,

Vonda

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Hands for Soldiers and New DVD!

janeyturner3Since this is July 4th week, it's only fitting that we talk about our military. But instead of talking generalities, I want to tell you about my young friend, Janey Turner and her Hands for Soldiers ministry. Janey does more than talk.

Janey has always had a heart for helping others, so when the eight-year-old wanted to send care packages to soldiers in foreign lands, her parents weren't surprised. She stood in the middle of her kitchen, holding a list of names. "I can only pick one soldier? But what about the rest of them?"

Her mother studied the list of seven military men and women serving in Iraq. "McKissick Elementary isn't the only school sending care packages. You just pick the soldier you want. Someone else will take care of the others."

"But what if somebody gets left out? They'll think no one in America cares about them." "Sweetheart, you know you can't send a package to everyone."

Janey hugged the list. "I know. But I can try."

And she did. She started by using her allowance to send packages to all seven soldiers sponsored by her school. Then she canvassed her neighborhood and asked neighbors and friends for the names of other soldiers who were away from home. Enlisting the help of her grandmother, Janey bought more supplies and sent more packages.janeyturner2

And the names kept coming. Realizing her project was getting too big for her family to handle alone, she came up with a plan. First, she made an appointment with the mayor of Easley, South Carolina, her hometown. After the little girl explained her plan, Mayor Chris Christopherson donated money and promised to help spread the word. Then Janey visited the Easley police department, who gave her 144 pencils to put in the care packages. It was only the beginning. A few months later, with a card table set up in her living room, Hands for Soldiers was a booming ministry.

Using clear plastic gloves, Janey fills each finger of the glove with candy, toothbrushes, toothpaste, pens, mints, ChapStick, and gum. In the center of the glove, she adds a special gift like a baseball, a Bible, or a set of cards. Each goodie-bag has a decorated, hand-made card that says, "Thank you for your service. You deserve a big hand. Love, Janey."

But packages aren't limited to the names on the list. Janey sees that each recipient receives a box containing 25 to 30 care packages. "That way the soldiers can share with others in their groups." She also sends extra candy and gifts for the troops to share with children. "I want the kids to know Americans love them, too," she says.

janeyturner1Janey–now 14 years old–has sent over 17,000 care packages to soldiers around the world. From Iraq to Afghanistan, and Japan to Walter Reed Army Medical Center, our fighting men and women know someone in America appreciates them; someone in America cares.

If Janey could start this program when she was only eight, what can we do? We can help by donating money for supplies and shipping, and donating supplies for the packages. Needed items include:

  • Small Bibles
  • Hard candy, Sweet Tarts, suckers, Tic Tacs, bubble gum and chewing gum
  • Tooth brushes, tooth paste, hairbrushes, small combs, baby powder, nail clippers, breath mints, mouthwash, dental floss, shampoo, razors, deodorant, BAND-Aids, lotion, ChapStick
  • Pens, pencils, notepads, baseballs, playing cards, key chainsamericanflaglarge

Janey is also a recording artist who performs at special events around the country and will be singing at the Greenville Drive professional baseball game in Greenville, SC this weekend, July 11, at 7pm. 

For more information about Hands for Soldiers, a 501(c)(3) charity, check out Janey's website. 

You can also reach Janey at , , , .

Whether it's a time of peace or a time of war, thousands of men and women are scattered throughout the world, protecting us and our freedoms. They need to know there is a God who loves them, regardless of where they are.

Thank you, Janey.

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Drumroll, please…

My new demo DVD is here! And what fun it was! I hope you'll check it out and let me know what you think. And please share it with your women's ministry friends and event planners. I'm booking 2011 events now and would love to be with you. πŸ™‚

At the risk of sounding like a commercial, I want to take a moment to brag about the great people at EVM, the producer of both this video and of my Solomon's Beloved video. First of all, they are always so patient with me (and if you know me and technology, that's a LOT of patience!). They worked with me from every angle to come up with just the right material, tone, and length. And they are more affordable than any reputable company I could find out there.

You can check out a portfolio of their video work here (Yes, I realize I'm not there yet, but maybe I'll show up one of these days…hint…hint…hint). 

A couple of my author friends have also had EVM create their websites, and both are very happy with the results. EVM develops websites for writers, insurance agents, dentists, restaurants, and anyone else who needs a professional site for their business. If you have a minute, you might want to take a look at their website portfolio, too. 

After working with EVM for years, I can tell you they have taken good care of me and have always delivered what they promised–and more! I look forward to working with them on several new video projects in the next year. As you can tell, I highly recommend them!

(Don't forget to check out the video. I think you'll like it. πŸ™‚

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womenwhorequest Statewide Prayer Retreat for Women

If you live in the Upstate SC area, I'd love to see you at Women Who Request by Prayer, a statewide women's prayer retreat, July 30-31 at Anderson University in Anderson, SC. I'll be speaking on The Prayer of Repentance and will be leading a Prayer Closet Session on Repentant Prayer. Other speakers at the upstate event include Ruth McWhite, Brenda Blankenship, and Tiffany Watkins.

The remaining SC retreats will be in Myrtle Beach October 1-2 and Winnsboro October 29-30.

For more information or to register, please visit the website. 

Praying women can change the world!

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I Need Your Kudos!

Had a new article published? Signed a contract? Released a new book? Have a new website or a new ministry? We want to celebrate with you!

Next week is kudos week, so contact me WITH THIS INFORMATION:

  • NAME
  • STATE
  • GOOD NEWS
  • LINK TO PUBLICATION, IF AVAILABLE AND APPLICABLE
  • YOUR WEBSITE

Thanks! Can't wait to hear what God's been doing in your lives!

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Blog Tour Contest–Deadline July 15!csslogo

Do you have a 2010 book you want to share with the world? Well, here's your opportunity to get a free Blog Tour! (Remember to read and follow instructions carefully!) 

Be sure to let me know if you enter your book in the contest and we'll announce it on the blog. Maybe we could generate some votes for you!

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And even though I think I referred to this passage recently, it's exactly what we need to meditate on this Fourth of July week:

…if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. 2 Chronicles 7:14

Humble…pray…seek…and turn. And then He will hear…forgive…and heal.

I pray God's blessing on the work of your hands and your hearts,

Vonda

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